Eleven

11 December 2022 - the date of my last blog post 🤦🏾

I had always wanted to write but I lacked the motivation to start - until one day when I did. Writing has been and continues to be therapeutic for me. I write based on insiparation from day to day life experiences. There was a time when I was writing almost every week. Then boom! For a whole year, I could not find inspiration from within to do the very that I love. I liken this to seasons in life. There are times when we feel motivated and on top of the world. The question is, what do we do when we lose the motivation to do that which brings us joy and fulfilment? It is a question that I am still trying to figure out the answer.

11 years ago - I tied the knot 💍

If I could turn back the hands of time, I would still do it all over again, and with the same person! It has been quite a ride. We always joke about how our interests are so divergent and marvel at how we have managed to stay together for this long. When I was looking for a partner, I had three things on my checklist:

1. Someone I shared common values with.

2. Someone with a personality I was prepared to wake up to for the rest of my life.

3. Someone who did not tick any of my deal breakers.

I am not sure what her criteria was, but once she checked these three, I knew that we could work around everything else. Marriage has taught me compromise. Marriage has taught me selflessness. Marriage has taught me responsibility. Marriage has taught me accountability. Marriage has moulded me into a better person.

Are all days good? The answer is no! But there are many more good days than bad. (I wrote about marriage here)

11 years ago - I had a brush with death 🔴

I had an accident eight months after getting married (I wrote about it here). Going through this experience shaped in me a different perspective about life. There is no right time to die. We are all candidates of death, patiently waiting for our turn. Whether one is on the death bed suffering from a terminal illness, driving on the road or going about their day to day business. What we chooses to do with this reality is up to each of us. Knowing that death can visit anytime (though unwelcome) should make us:

1. Cherish one another more.

2. Create a positive legacy by living impactful lives.

3. Focus our time and energy on things that matter.

11 years ago - I qualified as a chartered accountant 🏅

It is a career that has brought me so many privileges. A qualification that offers countless opportunities in as many countries as one may be interested in. Being a chartered accountant has taken me to eight countries and for that I am grateful. I have also learnt that although sharing this same qualification, we all have different destinies. Some of my peers have gone on to have illustrious careers thus far while some's CVs are not so decorated. It is all good. We have different lanes. The question is what brings you meaning and fulfilment and how far one is willing to settle for. In different careers, one thing I have seen holding true often times is that those most audacious, those with a sizeable dose of self belief, those not afraid of change and/or those who position themselves to seize opportunities tend to be the most successful.

The downside of my career has been the elusiveness of work life balance. Hopefully one of these days I will be able to figure it out. I have also battled with the question of whether in pursuing this career, I am living my purpose. The time I find most satisfaction is when I make a positive impact in other people's lives and I believe this anchors my purpose. There are people who have worked under me who have gone on to have brilliant careers and seeing their growth has been a highlight. However, I still feel that my career has not intersected with my purpose enough to give me the fulfilment that I am looking. The journey to finding this equilibrium continues.

11 things to be thankful for in 2023 👏

1. I'm thankful for the gift of health because there are people who were taking better care of themselves who did not manage to get through the year with their health intact. As the year comes to an end and you are still in good health, you have every reason to be thankful too.

2. During the year, we went through the most significant changes as a family since we moved to Ireland and I am grateful that by and large, the planned changes went well. Again, I don't take this for granted because I'm well aware that having plans does in no way guarantee that those plans will come to fruition. If any of the plans that you had for the year also came to pass, that is progress and you have every reason to be thankful too.

3. The kids changed schools during the year. We were not sure whether they would settle in well at the new school. We are thankful that they did and are liking it.

4. Just being alive is a blessing and if we are to be honest with ourselves, we take zero credit for seeing this year off (assuming nothing happens on the 31st 😜) and for that, I am thankful.

5. There was a health complication in the family at the beginning of the year that would have required a considerable sum of money to resolve but I'm thankful that it was resolved sooner and at a much lower cost than anticipated.

6. I am thankful for the gift of family. Having a support system of people (called family) that you know have your back and wish the best for you is such a blessing. In addition, being responsible for little lives that look up to you for protection and provision and seeing them grow year in year out is another super fulfilling experience and for that I am thankful.

7. There are things in life that we have no control over. Not knowing how certain events will play out in the future can be a source of great anxiety. Over time, my motto has become, "Everything will be ok in the end, if it's not ok, then it's not the end." (I wrote about it here) Whether the eventual outcome is good or bad, this has worked well for me as a coping mechanism and saved me from loads of stress and for that I am thankful.

8. My young brother wedded this year. He was the best man at my wedding. Seeing him take this huge milestone was a big highlight of the year and for that, I am thankful.

9. I am thankful for my faith in God for it has shaped my perspective about life and has also helped me to find meaning in both the good and the bad as well as life in general.

10. Being far away from home, having a community of people whom you share a similar background with be it at work, in social or church circles is underrated. It is such circles that keep some people sane in these foreign lands and we have many people whom we have grown to call friends. For that, I am thankful.

11. By counting the eleven things I am thankful for, one might be tempted to think everything was smooth but the answer is no. By choosing to focus on the positives, I am encouraging us all to count our blessing no matter how brutal the year might have been. If we take stock of our lives, there are many things to be grateful for and being grateful gives us hope that tomorrow will be better. Therefore, I will end by saying I am also thankful for the failures, the plans that did not succeed, and all the pain, for we learn more in times of adversity than of prosperity.

2024, we try again 💪.